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I returned from a two-day trip which is nothing unusual for me. I found my best friend's name tattooed on my wife's ass. She says that nothing happened, that they just got bored the other day when he came over and they were waiting for me to get back and as usual, I got delayed. I don't know what I should do, I'd like to give her the benefit of doubt but...am unsure. Is there someone out there who is reading this that can give me some advice or at least their honest opinion of this situation?

I generally have no faith in polygraphs, but it might be useful in this sitch. If she passes, I'd require removal of the tattoo to continue the M.

How can she say 'nothing happened'? She tattooed another guy's name on her butt. Even if boredom was the reason, why wasn't your name chosen? If it were my W, this might be a deal killer, even without a polygraph..

[This message edited by SI Staff at 6:12 PM, Saturday, November 14th]

Thank you for answering I never thought to ask why his name instead of mine, so I just now finished having a not so pleasant talk with her about this. She told me that she didn't think that I'd like her putting my name on her ass because I had never asked her to do it. Which is true, I hadn't. I then asked why she needed any nae at all on that ass and she said that lately she had been feeling neglected and alone so putting his name there made her feel wanted and needed because he is such a good friend of ours. As far as a lie detector test no way she says. I just need to believe her, and everything will be fine, I need to trust her more she says. I suggested getting it covered over, she refuses. It's not only his first name but both names, first and last. I really want to believe her but it's not going to be easy. I just might confront him and see what he says about it.

Freddy,

I’m going to take this at face value and that you’re not trolling here.

While you were away, your wife was with your best friend, pulled her pants down, and got his name tattooed on her ass.

So your "best friend" now has marked that territory as his own. And she’s not getting rid of it. And that made her feel wanted (so I guess your "best friend" wants her?) and needed (why the fuck would that make her feel needed?)

But anyway, now she has another man’s name tattooed on her ass and you just need to trust her more.

Come the fuck on, brother.

I sincerely hope this is a troll cos it made me giggle. As did letmebefrank’s frank response. So my honest opinion is that it is so absurd and egregious that it’s either a definite, 100%, no shadow of a doubt deal breaker, or a joke.

If I were more vindictive, it might give me inspo for revenge on my cheating partner... imagine the reaction…

If this is real though then I am hugely sorry for you. I think the absurdity would make it all the more difficult to process and make sense of.

Bro, is this even real? This sounds so far fetched to even believe. And if it is real why do you have to ask us what to do about it? I mean how do you feel about your wife getting a full first and last name tattoo of another man on her ass for you to look at for the rest of your life?

This story is insane. I think we are being trolled on here now. There is absolutely no way I would ever be okay with my wife getting another man's name tattoo on her ass, especially just because she was bored. Come on dude. What does that say? I mean what does that tell you? At the very least it is extremely disrespectful to you. And at the most she is having sex with him and putting his name on her body is a sign of saying that her ass belongs to him.

What was another man doing at your house spending time alone with your wife while you were out of town? That right there should tell you even more. There is now way that is happening even if they are just friends. It opens up the door to so much more inappropriate behavior and feelings developing and talking about things they should not be talking about with each other and complaining about you and next thing you know they are having an affair.

And what does it take to work up to the point of them deciding to go get this done while you are gone anyway? What state of mind were they in? Were they under the influence? If so you can all but guarantee there was some hanky panky also taking place while you were gone. Was this a sober decision? Then I would be even more concerned. How does a wife make this decision sober? And if she was drunk then why was she drunk alone with your best friend at your home while you were out of town? Both of those scenarios are unacceptable.

Also, she did not think you would like her putting your own name on her body but you would be okay with her putting another man's full name on her ass permanently? That would be okay? This is not even real life right now brother. Come on. This has to be a joke.

Finally, are you ready for the nail in the coffin? Here it is: Her explanation about why she did it tells you everything you need to know. "She had been feeling neglected and alone so putting his name there made her feel wanted and needed because he is such a good friend." In what world is this even remotely close to being a normal reaction to feeling neglected? A normal rection would be to talk to you about those feelings if in fact she was even having those feelings at all in the first place.

The more likely explanation is that she is already starting to re-write the narrative of your marriage and frame things in such a way so as to explain why she and your best friend are so close and spending so much time together and to soothe her own conscience about what they are doing behind your back.

On top of all this, she refuses to address your concerns, refuses to take a lie detector, and refuses to have the tattoo altered.

Bro, what benefit of the doubt is there to give her? You are in denial if you think this can be explained away as them being bored. This is a deal breaker 100% of the time. Ain't no way in hell this is happening on my watch.

Tell her you have an online friend called Bigger…

She refuses to cover it or back up her bullshit story with a polygraph. That should be bare minimum to avoid divorce, along with going no contact with your "best friend".

I just might confront him and see what he says about it.

What can he say about it that’s going to make this any better?

Although strange, then this isn’t the most unbelievable nor strange story I have seen here…

Friend – IMHO that name says a lot, but you won’t have any clear message until you get to the bottom of what your wife and your best friend were doing that eventually led to them thinking getting his name tattooed on her derriere was such a great idea.
I think you should talk to your friend. Ask him what happened, have him describe the build-up. Ask him direct questions like… why are you hanging out with my wife when I’m not home? How did this idea ever pop up? Where was his friend-mind when he agreed that this was a great idea? Go for details like where the tattoo was done, how much did it cost, who paid, when, what time, how long did it take, were they drunk…
Tell him that if anything then your friendship deserves that you are told the truth. If he’s fooling around with your wife then learning it NOW from him might save the friendship. Discovering maybe a month from now… that would be the death of whatever you two have.

Based on his reply… I would probably be telling him to stay away from you while you try to understand how a "friend" let’s this happen.

Then have more-or-less the same story with your wife. Ask the same questions. See if the stories match up. If this was an innocent "joke" then there shouldn’t be many inconsistencies.